Congratulations! You’re not perfect! It’s ridiculous to want to be perfect anyway.        But then, everybody’s ridiculous sometimes, except perfect people.

You know what perfect is? Perfect is not
eating or drinking or talking or moving a muscle or making even the teensiest
mistake.

Perfect is never doing anything wrong – which means never doing
anything at all.

Perfect is boring! So you’re not perfect! Wonderful! Have fun!
Eat things that give you bad breath! Trip over your own shoelaces! Laugh! Let
somebody else laugh at you!

Perfect people never do any of those things. All
they do is sit around and sip weak tea and think about how perfect they are.
But they’re really not one-hundred-percent perfect anyway. You should see them
when they get the hiccups! Phooey! Who needs ’em? You can drink pickle juice
and imitate gorillas and do silly dances and sing stupid songs and wear funny
hats and be as imperfect as you please and still be a good person.

Good people are hard to find nowadays. And they’re a lot more fun than perfect people
any day of the week.

Stephen Manes, Be a Perfect Person in Just Three Days!